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Opinion

Hard To Imagine A Goodbye

By Nathaniel Ikyur 

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Ikpah

Mama Becky Ade Mac Ikpah turned 70th years four years ago. During the modest birthday celebration at her expansive residence in New GRA, Gboko, we came, ate, danced, smiled lavishly and cracked jokes. But of course that was her lifestyle. Always smiling. Always wanting to make sure you are comfortable. Fully served. 

I came to know Mama, whom we would later be calling her ‘Grand Ma’ when her husband, Chief Silas Mfa Mac Ikpah was contesting for the Benue State Governorship on the platform of United Nigeria Congress Party, UNCP in 1997. The party which dominated the political space under that dispensation was one of the five political parties sanctioned by the government of General Sani Abacha. And it was considered as a proxy of the Nigerian military to be handed over power to. 

Going by the way Silas Ikpah was pulling through, he was considered the governor in waiting. But the sudden death of Abacha truncated all of that.

I was a young man learning the ropes in journalism and also desirous to be part of the political movement at that time. Most of those who would later become key players in the political life of Benue State and elsewhere were always around with Mac Ikpah. Agiri Ojene who was speculated to be his running mate then would later be picked by Senator George Akume in 1998. 

And Mama Becky Ade was readily available with all her girls in the house to entertain you. No time passed without a large reservoir of food and drinks ready for any of the politicians or their ‘boys’. They were in large numbers. Their Agedam residence was the political center point and a beehive of activities.

Days turned into weeks, months and then years. Around 2001, Silas Ikpah encouraged me to run for the House of Representatives seat for Gboko/Tarka Federal Constituency on the platform of the defunct ANPP in 2003. And Mama was my first guide on what to do. According to her, she had watched me carefully and she felt I should take a shot at the proposition. Although I lost, I had become a part of the Ikpah family. From Gboko to Makurdi to Makurdi and Abuja, I had free access to the Silas Mfa Mac Ikpah home. 

Fast forward. Mama Becky came to know my family and particularly my biological mother in the village. She would stop over and give her a loaf of bread and other stuff my Mom would request from her anytime she was coming to Makurdi or going back to Gboko. We became a family. She was everywhere anytime I was celebrating or mourning. She was at my daughter’s wedding from the traditional to the main wedding. When her friend, my biological mother died in 2022, it was Mama Becky Ade who drove all the way from Gboko to plead with the Catholic Priest in charge of Wannune Parish then, who had declined officiating at my mom’s funeral over frivolous reasons. But for Mama, I would have asked my church pastor to officiate.

Writing about this woman of virtue will be in volumes. And because we don’t read, I’m summarizing.

On June 5th, this year, Mama called me again. I was driving but stopped by the roadside to answer. We spoke heartily but not after some scolding. I was to call her back the next day. I never did. Then suddenly, this bad news was broken to me. I wanted to assume it was a fairy tale. But alas, it wasn’t. For I confirmed this when I visited her Gboko residence. Her usual movement back and forth from the kitchen to that huge mango tree where we would sit and be entertained with whatever your choice would be was missing. I missed her sonorous voice of “Honourable, are you okay with this”? “Do you want more”. I also missed that time keeping bell 🔔 she kept by her side to draw the attention of her numerous children ready for service. I also missed the jokes and all. And like play, the days are drawing closer to the reality. 

Mama Becky Ade Mac Ikpah, it’s hard to imagine and to say a goodbye to you. Your warm and infectious smiles won’t allow me. Those smiles makes me feel you are just a dial away. You represented everything of motherhood, care and protection. As you take this bow from this part of the divide, I’m convinced you’re standing before the throne of grace without spot. May the Angels welcome you home with the blasts of triumphant entry. Good night my dear and loving mother. 

Rest in Peace, Amen.

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