Verbal Abuse And How To Deal With It

Verbal abuse is a type of emotional abuse. It is when someone uses their words to assault, dominate, ridicule, manipulate, and/or degrade another person and negatively impact that person’s psychological health.

Verbal abuse can occur in any type of relationship: romantic relationships, parent-child relationships, family relationships, and co-worker relationships.

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Verbal abuse sometimes precedes physical abuse; however, this is not always the case. Verbal abuse can exist without physical abuse. The effects of verbal abuse can be just as damaging as those of physical abuse.

Signs of Verbal Abuse

1.They call you names. 2. They use words to shame you. 3. They make jokes at your expense. 4. They humiliate you in public. 5. They make threats. 6. They yell, scream, or swear at you.

Impact of Verbal Abuse

Staying in a verbally abusive relationship can have long-lasting effects on your physical and mental health.

Verbal abuse can impact every element of life, from academic performance to relationships to success at work. Just like any other form of abuse or bullying, verbal abuse has both short- and long-term consequences, including:

• Anxiety
• Changes in mood
• Chronic stress
• Decreased self-esteem3
• Depression
• Feelings of shame, guilt, and hopelessness
• Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)7
• Social withdrawal and isolation8
• Substance use

What to Do About Verbal Abuse

The first step in dealing with it is to recognize the abuse. If you were able to identify any type of abuse in your relationship, it’s important to acknowledge that first and foremost.

By being honest about what you are experiencing, you can begin to take steps to regain control. While you need to consider your individual situation and circumstances, these tips can help if you find yourself in a verbally abusive relationship.

Set Boundaries

Firmly tell the verbally abusive person that they may no longer criticize, judge or shame you, name-call, threaten you, and so on. Then, tell them what will happen if they continue this abusive behavior.

For instance, tell them that if they scream or swear at you, the conversation will be over and you will leave the room. The key is to follow through; don’t set boundaries you have no intention of keeping.

Limit Exposure

If possible, take time away from the verbally abusive person and spend time with people who love and support you. Limiting exposure with the person can give you space to reevaluate your relationship. Surrounding yourself with a network of friends and family will help you feel less lonely and isolated and remind you of what a healthy relationship should look like.

End the Relationship

If there are no signs that the verbal abuse will end, or that the person has any intention of working on their behavior, you will likely need to take steps to end the relationship.

Before doing so, share your thoughts and ideas with a trusted friend, family member, or counselor. You may also want to come up with a safety plan in case the abuse escalates when you break things off.

Seek Help

Healing from a verbally abusive relationship may not be something you can do on your own. Reach out to trusted loved ones for support, and consider talking to a therapist who can help you process your emotions and develop healthy coping skills for dealing with the short- and long-term consequences of verbal abuse.

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