Shyngle and Stella Wigwe

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How Shyngle Wigwe’s Marriage To Stella Survived 60 Years Despite Initial Strong Opposition

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In a time when divorce has sadly been on an escalating rate, late Herbert Wigwe’s parents, Shyngle and Stella Wigwe, few months ago shared secrets of what has kept their marriage going for over 60 years. 

Shyngle and Stella Wigwe shared this on Colours of Life Television show. Shyngle narrating how he met Stella, the love of his life said, “I had a friend in the hospital where she worked in Enugu. Enugu was the capital of Eastern Region at the time and I was working in the Nigerian Broadcasting Corporation in Enugu.

Shyngle said he used to visit his friends at the hospital where he met Stella.

“I saw this young lady and I heard a voice say clearly, this is your wife. It was so surprising. I started frequenting the hospital more.”

Then one day, Stella asked, “why are you frequenting the hospital so often? Are you now working in this place?” Shyngle replied, “You will answer that question very soon.”

“All I did was continue to send her cards, continue to tell her that I was around. Then it got to a point when she was about to leave for England for a scholarship. 

“I had to invite her out. My mother happened to be in Enugu at the time, I made sure my mother saw her. She was there 10- 15mins, she left and I went back to my mom.  

“I said by the way mama that gril I brought here, I want to marry her o. I just brought here so that you will see her. Next question, where is she from? I said Efik. She said no..”

“My mother went back home to arrange a lady for me to marry. I had never disobeyed my mother. 

Fortunately, around the same time, Shyngle received a scholarship to go and study  abroad in 1959 where he reunited with Stella, got married to her before he came back to Nigeria with her.

See picture of the newly wedded Shyngle and Stella below 👇

On how they have stayed together despite ethnic differences as spotted by his mother, Shyngle said he had to take responsibility to see that the marriage worked out.

“I said to myself, I owe my parents a responsibility to see that this marriage succeeds because I have taken the bull by the horn myself and if it fails they will say, ‘we told him’. And now they see that the marriage can work and still counting at 60 years.

On how they both have been able to manage children rivalry, Shyngle said,  “As a rule, I phone these children on a daily basis till now. I remind them that their strength lies in the fact that they are united. I also tell them that their greatest enemy is the enemy within the family. So I tell them that they have to live by the tenets of the Bible. You have to be looking out for the other brother or sister to know how well she’s doing or how well he’s doing.

“You must be prepared to give a lending hand. Because in our own generation, we made sacrifices for each other. We were not born with silver spoons. I remind them that if God blesses one of them, that blessing is for all of them.”

“I gave Herbert the responsibility of ensuring that yearly, there is a meeting of the Wigwe clan. You find out who is in serious want and assist. It is important for peace within the family.

“I remind them that God has a purpose for letting you all come from the same womb so I tell them that they should extend a helping hand to anyone who has a need.”

Shyngle also revealed that the family’s devotion to God is a major ingredient that has kept his family together.

“Praying together binds the family together. In fact there is no way you’ll keep malice with the other person and begin to share scriptures. So even if you are annoyed with somebody and you begin to share scriptures, you will wipe away the past.”

Stella emphasized the need for modesty despite how accomplished members of the family may turn out to be.

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“When I got married, my mother gave me golden bars. But they were all stored in the bank then. For someone else, it may have gotten into her head. Now I don’t know where they are and what happened to them. Ostentation living is not a part of me,” she said.

Shyngle added: Ostentation takes you  nowhere, you build up more enemies by showing off. You may have no relationship with somebody and he may just think you are flaunting wealth. You are rubbing it on their eyes. It pays to live a modest life. If you have surplus, you can share it with your neighbours.

“God is just making you a treasurer, you use it to help others who are less fortunate. You are not getting anything because you earn much more than others. It’s Simply by grace.”

In all, Stella and Shyngle bore Six children save the passing away of Osita and Herbert Wigwe. They are both pastors and counselors. Stella has also written a book titled, “Marriage: The Nectar of A Fulfilled Life”.

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